Revenge of the
KillerGeeks
It started as a piece of innocent fun, but some people took it a little TOO seriously...
I stood in line at Thrifty. I had $2.35 in my hand. All I wanted was a pack of cigarettes. My patience was wearing thin.
$4.78 was on the register. A can of weedkiller, a red Magic marker, a pack of gum. And two small furry toys.
The guy in front of me had placed his wallet on the belt. He was now going through his pockets, fishing for change. An esoteric collection of items joined his empty wallet. A length of string. A ball of used tissues. A Swiss Army knife. A guitar pick. A couple of computer disks.
I sighed audibly. He looked round at me, stared. He looked familiar, but I couldn't place him. His eyes were blank, his face without expression. I looked back, tapping my right foot.
He resumed searching through his backpack. A tee shirt. A visor. More disks. A bottle of water. A rabbit's foot. A Garfield comic book. More disks. A...five dollar bill!
He handed it over. While the clerk found 22 cents, he started refilling his bag and his pockets. He stared at me again. He looked disconcertingly familiar. I racked my brains, seeing the face, the cropped hair, a white short-sleeved shirt, a tie...but where?
He took his change, pocketed it, scooped up his ill-assorted possessions and his new purchases and swept them into his pack. Giving me one last look, he turned abruptly and moved haltingly to the door.
"Marlboro lights. In a box. Please."
I looked down. He'd left a disk. I picked it up, turned it over.
"$2.35."
I absently handed over the cash, reading the label on the disk. 'AOL for Macintosh'.
"Thanks."
I took the cigarettes, looked towards the door. He'd gone. I pocketed the disk.
Gottit! "AOL Geek of the Week"! The Sesame Street Guy! That's who he was! Strange. I had no idea who he was or where he lived. I'd only seen him on a screen in Dogman and Maureen's "Gallery of Geeks". I supposed he lived around here. The Web is a small world. But strange all the same.
I'd gotten a mail from Dogman a few days before. He'd spotted a couple of "Geeks of the Week" in his neighborhood in Portland, Oregon. He'd mentioned the vacant looks, the strange gaits.
And now one was here.
I left the store, walked towards the parking lot. He was standing in the next aisle to my car, watching me.
I was spooked. This was just too weird. I spotted a pay phone. The receiver was dangling from the box by its cord. I replaced it, retrieved a quarter from my jeans. I happened to glance down. There was a disk on the ground. I flipped it with the toe of my boot. AOL. For Macintosh.
I inserted the quarter, dialed. As the phone rang, I checked out the geek. He'd gone. I glanced around. About thirty yards away, a marginally female figure was approaching. Her walk was awkward, familiar.
"Hello, this is Maureen."
"Hi. It's me."
"What's up?"
"Listen. This is too weird. I just spotted the Sesame Street Guy.."
"You're kidding!"
"No, straight up. He's here. Somewhere in the parking lot near Lucky's."
"Jeez. That's WEIRD! Dogman said..."
"I know." I cut her off. "That's why I thought it was strange..."
"So.."
"You busy right now?"
"No..."
"OK. I'll come over."
"OK."
"See you in five."
The female figure was about ten feet away. I recognized her. She looked Scandinavian. The only female geek in the whole rogue's gallery. But her - its? - eyes...
I walked hurriedly to my car, fumbling for my keys, checking the lot for the Sesame Street Guy. Nowhere to be seen.
Reaching the car, I opened the driver's door. On the seat was a disk. I didn't need to read the label.
I turned the ignition. Dead.
"Shit!"
New battery and a tune-up last week. I flipped open the hood.
(To be continued...)
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©
FeNiX 1996